To the One Who Loves Him Next
by xx Lady Knight xx
Summary: Malec: Alec wrote a letter about Magnus after they broke up- a letter that Alec never intended to see the light of day. However, Isabelle has no intention of letting her brother be a heartbroken mess and secretly resolves to get them back together. COMPLETE.
1. Alec

**A letter Alec wrote about Magnus, with no intention of mailing. Inspired by a post I saw on tumblr…but with a twist. ;) More to come. **

**~ xx Lady Knight xx**

* * *

><p>To the one who loves him next:<p>

He's adorably sleepy in the morning. You'll tell him to wake up and he'll moan, pull you down with him and create a world between just the two of you. He gets cold at night, even though he's an immortal warlock so please make sure he gets the extra blankets. They should be in the hall closet, second shelf.

He's incapable of feeding himself three nutritious meals a day and has an unhealthy relationship with coffee. He likes to stare into the bottom of the cup and watch it refill itself. He may be immortal, but by the Angel, please try to make him eat something other than Taki's pancakes and Chinese food. Also, he never cleans the coffee machine so maybe you could do that every once in a while so he doesn't poison himself.

He values honesty over other qualities. Don't ever lie to him, because he will find out and that will be it, relationship over. Don't go behind his back and also stay away from his past lovers. They are seriously bad news. I guess that would include me, because if I ever met you, I'd probably knock you out. Sorry. It wouldn't be anything personal. Don't obsess about his past. Otherwise, it will be over before you can blink and you will be left kicking yourself and wishing that you could turn back time. I know that's what I do.

He has the most amazing eyes. When they look at you in love, they glow and you feel like you'll always be safe, loved and in his arms. Forever. When they're angry, they're dark and sparks seem to fly, to singe and burn you. But on a more practical note, if you're trying to hide the fact from your sister and parabatai that you've just had an intense make out session, ask him not to put on quite so much glitter.

If you want to make his day, let him pick out an outfit for you and stroll through the Village holding hands. But that "Blink If You Want Me" shirt is _mine_, do you understand? _Mine_. He always will notice when you try and make an extra effort, even if in my case, that used to mean changing my black t-shirt for my blue t-shirt or wearing the leather jacket he bought me instead of my gray hoodie. Even though he's not talking to me anymore, the jacket is the best thing I own and have no intention of giving it back. Get your own. But, I don't know you, so maybe you're a fashion expert. I find myself curious, who will you be? Who will the only person who ever seemed to understand me fill the Alec-sized hole in his life with?

Anyway. Back on track. His arms are a work of art. Seriously, I kid you not, they belong in a museum. Inside an exhibit titled "The Wonders of Nature that are Magnus Bane's Exquisite, Bronze, Sculpted ARMS." Or something. Not that I've given it a lot of thought. Must be something to do with summoning all those demons on the sly. When you're being held in them, nothing can touch you. Okay, maybe not so much back on track.

He is a total nerd about ancient texts and scrolls in demon tongues. You'll try to talk to him while he's reading, with these chunky black nerd glasses on that he doesn't need. But he looks adorable, so I wouldn't bring it up. He'll pull you onto his lap and hug you tight. And you'll laugh and kiss his cheek, cuddling, but his gorgeous eyes won't see you, they'll be too busy translating and practically glowing with new knowledge. Somehow, you won't mind.

The cat comes first. Always. Don't forget to buy Chairman Meo a birthday present. He is partial to these cat treats they sell down in the Village, at the little shop where Magnus buys wind chimes and crystals to hang in the windows of his apartment. He's captivating like that. Magnus, I mean, not the Chairman.

Sometimes, when he throws a party he'll drink to forget. What that is, he's never really told me. His past is a deep and murky object that you're better off just accepting as much as you can. Do you understand? When he does, help him to his bedroom, call Jace and Izzy- or I mean, whoever that would be for you- and kick everyone out. Then kick them out too. Put a cool washcloth on his forehead, stroke his hair, cradle him against you so that he stays upright. Help him stay awake, otherwise he will wake with the worst hangover. Make him drink potion #42, in his cabinet. It's a minty tasting hangover cure that his friend Tessa brewed for him, works for Shadowhunters and warlocks alike.

But most importantly, he needs reassurance and love and small touches. A hand on his back, stroke his hair out of his eyes, link your pinkies together- wait no don't do that, that was one of our things. He is an immortal warlock. Most of the time, people assume that he doesn't need protection. I don't care. Give him all the protection you've got or else if something- anything- happens to him then you'll have ME to answer to.

Don't let him get too worn out please, I worry so much about him. If you cannot take care of him, then just leave before you can hurt him.

In return though, he will take care of you. He will give your sister a special weapon to keep her safe, he will fight for your parabatai and he will hold you late at night when you sneak out of the house. When your father doesn't understand or accept you and your mother ignores the fact that you're not exactly who they planned to be. When nothing is going right and the world is literally burning and being flooded with demons from the realms. And though you could never tell Izzy and especially not Jace…it wouldn't be so bad just to settle down and not to have to fight demons all the time. To tell him that sometimes, I feel a little scared, that _this_ could be the one fight that I don't come back from. But I can't say those words out loud, because I'm the oldest, the responsible one, the dependable guy. He was the only one who could make me feel like myself, the only one who understood when no one else did.

And if you lose his love, if you do something wrong…then you will never get over the pain and your world will crash down on you, you will drown beneath the onslaught of tears wept late at night in regret and you won't be able to see the point in the small little details that used to matter so much. Hair will wildly grow uncut, laundry will be a thing of the past, rooms will become more and more cluttered, food will go uneaten. Your life will be a puzzle, with ONE very glittery and blue piece missing, a piece you won't ever be able to replace. Just imagine that. It's probably a corner or edge piece too, to make it extra annoying that you can't finish the puzzle. Nothing fits the way it used to. Just don't let him go or give up on him.

Please love him with everything you have. He will love you back a thousand times more. He has the most wide, open, loving heart that I know. He will accept you for who you are and help you grow to be who you want to be. He will always be the best thing that ever happened to me. Once, I thought I wanted to change him. That I couldn't accept him for exactly who he was. Now, I realize what an utter fool I've been. By the Angel, don't make the same mistake. I swear by Raziel's sword that I'll track you down if you make him sad or make him cry. Izzy will help, which should make you very, very afraid.

If you can do this though, if you can love him and protect him and accept him then please…hold him tight and never let him go. He deserves to be happy.

Always,

~Alec~

* * *

><p><strong>Next chapter from Izzy's POV<strong>**…**


	2. Isabelle

**Thank you, thank you, thank you for all of your wonderfully kind reviews- it means the world to me! Hope you enjoy Izzy's POV, Magnus and the final chapter is next. **

** ~ xx Lady Knight xx**

* * *

><p>What have I been doing this weekend? Watching Alec fall apart. It started when he came home sobbing. Now, here's the thing. Alec doesn't cry. Ever. I mean, the guy can get stung by a Greater Demon and he might pass out quietly, but I mean no tears were shed then. He locked himself in his room and wouldn't open it until Jace threatened to break it down. Alec has always been fond of his door hinges.<p>

Jace has been lurking around Alec all weekend, hovering like a shadow but unsure what to do. He's shoved hairbrushes at him, brought him ENDLESS cups of tea (the one thing Jace knows how to make,) brought our cat Church into Alec's room, threatened to hold him under an ice cold shower…Alec doesn't react. Jace can't get under Alec's skin because it's like he's not seeing any of it, like he's not here with any of us. I haven't seen him eat since he came home. How is he supposed to fend off Ravener demons when he a strong gust of wind could sweep him away?

Robert- I stopped calling him Daddy when I was seven- is oblivious. Nothing new there.

Mom is anxious but not sure what to do, she thinks it's a funk that he'll snap out of. She's already lost one son. If she knew how upset Alec is, then I know she'd be frantic at the thought of losing another to a broken heart.

And me? All I want is to fix it, make it better. He has always been so protective of me, yet hides away his own feelings. I can't understand why he does that. He seems to think that despite the fact that I've been in multiple relationships, demon fighting classes etc. etc. that I am a fragile flower. Sigh. Boys. When I was little, I thought Alec knew everything, that he would always take care of me. Now, I take care of myself and I just wish that Alec would let me take care of him sometimes, too.

Magnus. That blue-haired, glittery, no-good warlock. I've left him seventeen voicemail messages, stood under his window and screamed, left threatening messages carved into his door, and shoved Post-It's with the words: "Take Alec back! Right now!" under his door. I've also told all his mundane neighbors what a jerk he is. They had no idea who lived there before, though they did notice the interesting party guests. I would just break down his door, but he's a warlock cheater and put spells on it so I can't.

This means war. This means drastic measures. This also means I must send Jace to Taki's for takeout, because both of us will brainstorm better while eating pancakes.

I called Simon, Clary, Maia, everyone that Magnus IS talking to right now. I also may have impersonated Maryse and Church on the phone in voicemail messages…what? I was pretending Church wanted to see the Chairman! Duh. Anyway, nothing. I guess the next step, since I can't ransack Magnus's apartment for clues about what happened and Alec is staring at the wall and won't talk about it, is to search Alec's room. I'll get Jace to take him for a walk. This should be interesting.

* * *

><p>After wrestling Alec into a jacket while he attempted to curl into a ball and lay on his bed, we finally got Alec bundled up and out the door. Jace promised to keep him outside for as long as he could.<p>

I search Alec's room quickly, knowing that Alec likely wouldn't know if things had been moved but being careful all the same. Shuffling through snapshots of him with Magnus, old movie tickets, random bric-a-brac, his phone tucked in the corner of his desk drawer. No new text messages, but I try MAGNUS as the password and surprise, surprise, it opens. Showing outgoing calls to Magnus at…3 am in the morning? Nothing useful here.

Moving on to what's on the desk itself. Three blue pens, one brand new, one completely used up and one half full, lie in a pile. Shoved under several books, are a few pieces of parchment paper.

"WE'RE HOME" I hear Jace yell from the front hall, making me jump. By the Angel. That was ten minutes, not the leisurely half hour I was looking for. Grabbing the papers and smoothing the cover on the bed, I fold them in half and- Alec comes storming into the room, making directly for the bed.

"What're you doing in my room?" he mutters, head already on the pillow, facing the wall.

"Uh…neatening up. Your room is a mess." I say quickly, holding the papers behind my back and edging towards the door.

"Looks the same to me." Alec mumbles before closing his eyes. Phew. My normally observant brother would definitely have seen me with the papers. Or maybe he just doesn't care.

"SO?" Jace whisper-yells behind me. "Did you find anything?" I shush him, and it's only when we're buried deep in the library that I show him the papers I found, written in clear blue ink with dried tears toward the end of one page.

We read them, of course. It might be an invasion of privacy, but drastic times call for drastic measures. It's clear to me once we finish reading that there is only one person who needs to read this letter and it isn't "to the one who loves him next." It's Magnus. There isn't going to BE a next. Alec is falling apart and I will do whatever it takes to make him whole again.

* * *

><p><strong>Magnus's POV next…leave a review if you'd like! :) <strong>


	3. Magnus

To The Biggest IDIOT Who Ever Lived:

No scratch that, that's being generous. You are the most foolish, silly, brainless, rash, thoughtless, half-baked, unintelligent, dim, wooden-headed dumbass that ever walked the planet. I hope you're proud of that accomplishment.

Chairman Meo is pleased you thought of him and remembered the special cat treats from that shop in the Village. He sends his regards.

Alexander Gideon Lightwood. Alec. Al. No, not Al, that doesn't fit. Isabelle gave me your letter, which I can only assume that you never intended me to read. What an idiotic assumption you made- that I'd ever love someone after you. I'd never love someone in the same all-consuming, frightening, exhilarating, thrilling way that I love you. A love like that never goes away and especially never replicates itself. Duh.

I'm sorry I ignored all your messages and incinerated my cell phone in a rage and then you couldn't send me messages or leave me voicemail at 3 am anymore. It had been a long, demon-filled day. I just needed some time, some space, to be by myself for a while. Sometimes we all need that.

I have magic, but magic won't keep me warm at night. That was always you, and of course the extra blankets in the hall closet, second shelf. Magic doesn't bring me happiness the way cuddling with you does, no, not even reading a super old scroll in demon languages.

Coffee is the mundane's best creation. Actually, it was probably created way back in the day by a warlock and a mundane took the credit. I will always have a relationship with it and please do not be jealous of my ability to refill the cup simply by looking at it. Also it has been scientifically proven that Taki's pancakes and Chinese food can fuel the mind for days on end. Besides, I'm immortal.

I will make you curator of this museum you speak of, specifically in charge of the exhibit: "The Wonders of Nature that are Magnus Bane's Exquisite, Bronze, Sculpted ARMS." I will be in charge of the exhibit entitled "Alec's Abs." I could give out free samples of glitter, maybe we could paint the walls a nice sparkly blue- focus Magnus, focus.

It makes me laugh that you like my eyes so much. Your eyes are the most exquisite blue that I've ever seen. As you know, blue eyes and black hair are my favorite combination. But when I say that, don't believe whatever poison Camille dripped in your ear about Will, because the only one I ever see is you. You remember Tessa? Tessa was always the one for Will. And Jem- well, I'll try to stay focused. Just know that there is not, and never will be, no other like you.

When I drink at parties, I drink to forget my dreams. Dreams of blood running through the city, of the world turning to flame. Of losing you. I drink when I start to forget things from long ago, people and faces that start to blur and look alike when I try to focus in on the details. How did her lips look, what did his earring look like, did she have freckles? When I forget the details, the rest of the face unravels like a tapestry and in another blink of a moment, it's gone. Will...Camille (there's something I always forget about her)…my first love…but you don't want to hear about my past. Or at least that's what I've always thought. Maybe that was my mistake.

Just like I have magic, I have immortality. Obviously you know this. I don't know if this going to work. You have to accept that I wouldn't change it if I could. That to lose it now would mean the end for me. But that would be my choice to make, not yours. And I wouldn't ask you to take on the great and terrible burdens of immortality. I wouldn't try to change who you are. Can you promise, swear to me, that you would never try to change who I am?

I said earlier that my mistake was never telling you about my past. Attached to this letter is a notebook. Inside is a list of the most important events and people who have been in my life. I want you to be a part of my life, to understand. I don't know if this is going to work. But I want to try.

I want to make you smile. I want to chase away all the frown lines that shade your forehead. I want to keep you safe, hold you in my arms and shield you from everything, from your father's disapproval to all the bloodthirsty demons roaming. When you stumble back to my apartment after a fight, so exhausted and gray and sometimes injured- it's like a piece of my soul is hurt. A piece of me that is always yours, never mine again. In all my years of loving others, I've never had that happen before. You are my first so many things, Alexander.

And of course that shirt is yours. In fact it may actually be in your closet. Understand that I could never fill an Alec-sized hole in my life, because you are the only Alec who would fit.

So I guess you better stick around. If you check your back left pocket, you'll find the key to my apartment. Whenever you're ready, come over and we can talk. Or I can memorize every inch of your body with my mouth while we cuddle and hold each other all night long. Whichever.

All my love,

Magnus xoxo

P.S. I'm glad you liked that leather jacket. Would you perhaps like a purple one with your name be-dazzled in rhinestones on the back?

_And they lived happily ever after. THE END._

* * *

><p><strong>Thank YOU for coming along for the ride, leave me a review if you'd like! Thanks for the gorgeous reviews! They really motivated me, and I'm so grateful to you all. Hope you enjoyed and have a great daynight! **

**Until next time, **

**~ xx Lady Knight xx :)**


End file.
